Airplane Annoyances
by ShinAyasaki
Summary: Nobody likes sitting in the middle seat on an airplane. Riko is no exception. AU.


Riko gave a small smile as she cracked open her book, ready to lose herself in the wonderful pages of _Passions of the Lily_ for the duration of her three hour flight.

She'd arrived promptly at the airport three hours before her flight, passing through the usual security checks without hassle before waiting at the gate like a good girl. Her carry-on luggage was checked for free, thanks to her flight being full, and her knapsack was stowed at her feet beneath the seat in front of her. Her seat belt was fastened and she was already starting to feel the groove worn into the seat by the last passenger giving way to form her own.

Yes, this was going to be a good flight.

"You-chan! I found our row!" called a loud voice as a ginger-haired girl came bounding up. She placed a finger at the number above the seating and turned back to call to her friend. "It's right here! Hurry up, You-chan!"

"Chika-chan, you can't possibly expect me to move so quickly with me carrying all our luggage!" returned You, orange and blue suitcases in her hands.

"Mou! Whatever happened to full speed ahead?"

"This is my full speed!"

Chika laughed before she returned her attention to her seat, face dropping her elation in favor of confusion as she looked at the redhead that would be sitting between her and You.

"...eh?" she said dumbly.

For her part, Riko tried to avoid the stare from crimson eyes, her nose burrowing deeper into her book to avoid the attentions of such a pretty girl. The pretty girl didn't say anything to her, but she kept staring at her and blinking. The redhead was getting quite nervous. She was about to say something when another pretty girl walked up to them.

"Okay," declared You, "There's enough space in the overhead compartment for mine, and there's a space back there for yours. Here," she said, offering the orange suitcase to the ginger.

"You-chan!" Chika suddenly exclaimed, "These rows have three seats!"

' _Most airplanes do..._ ' thought Riko, trying and failing to not pay attention to the pretty girls.

"Eh?! So we won't be sitting next to each other?!" cried You. "But... how did this even happen?"

"I guess... I wanted a window seat for me, and you wanted an aisle seat, and so long as they were the same row I didn't think about it..." lamented Chika. "I'm sorry, You-chan. I should have been more careful."

"No, no, it's not your fault," replied You. "But maybe... excuse me, miss?" she asked, leaning in to speak to Riko.

The redhead jumped as she looked into the bluest eyes she'd ever had the good fortune to gaze upon. "Y-Yes?" she stuttered out.

"The two of us," she started, gesturing to herself and Chika, "Would like to be able to sit together. So, would you be willing to swap seats with one of us?"

"You can have mine!" offered the ginger quickly. "Since it was my fault our seats are like this," she said to You. "Whaddya say? A nice window seat with a great view of the sky! Pretty neat, right?"

"Oh... um... I'm sorry, but, I can't sit in window seats. I have a fear of spontaneous explosive decompression, and window seats really bring that fear to the front of my mind."

"Then how about mine?" smiled You. "You'd get the most legroom in an aisle seat and easiest access to the bathroom."

"No!" rejected Riko quickly, "I can't possibly sit there either! I have a crippling phobia of flight attendants!"

The ginger and the brunette spent several seconds just staring at her in abject disbelief.

"It's a real problem, okay?!" snapped Riko defensively.

Chika and You shared a look at the ridiculousness of the excuse, but resigned themselves to sitting apart. They settled in, Chika practically giving Riko a lapdance as she clambered over the redhead to get to her window seat. You was much more restrained, though she accidentally stroked the inside of Riko's thigh while looking for her seatbelt.

Riko shivered at the sensation and almost let out a small purr. ' _No_ ,' she thought to herself, ' _These girls are loud and probably obnoxious. Don't get pulled into their charms by your gayness._ ' She shook her head to clear her thoughts, mind refocused on her book thanks to her self-scolding, and she began to read.

She didn't get far.

"Hey, miss! You-chan and I are on vacation! How about you?" smiled Chika as she once again invaded Riko's personal space.

Riko looked up at this stranger, pondering how she should respond. She didn't want to be rude, but she did want to be left alone. "Same," she all but grunted, hoping she would get the hint.

But this was Chika, so of course this wouldn't stop her from chatting up a pretty girl. "I'm Chika! And I already introduced you to You-chan," ("Nice to meet you," interjected You.) "What's your name?"

Riko sighed. She lowered her book just a fraction of an inch. "My name is Riko. And I would prefer to spend the next few hours reading my book without disturbance," she said. "Please," she added as an afterthought.

The ginger frowned but nodded her ascent, leaning back into her chair. And Riko thought that was the end of it.

It was, until the plane started taking off.

"Whoa!" cried Chika as the plane lifted off the tarmac. "We're really flying!"

' _Were you expecting anything else in an airplane?_ ' thought Riko, mildly annoyed at the amount of conversation in the air.

"It's definitely exciting, isn't it?" replied You.

"Oh my god! Look at all the tiny buildings! You-chan, come over here and look!"

"But we're not allowed to take off our seatbelts!"

"Just lean over or something, look!" With that, Chika reached across Riko and grabbed hold of You's shirt, tugging the brunette into Riko's lap so they could both look through the window.

"Wow..." breathed You. "It's amazing."

"I know, right?"

Riko cleared her throat. "Excuse me," she said, obviously disgruntled at the pretty girl that had just landed in her lap. ' _Whoa_ ,' she thought to herself, ' _I never thought I'd ever think that. I never thought this would even happen to me outside of a wet dream._ ' Aloud, she continued. "Could you please refrain from using my lap as a pillow? It's rather distracting."

"Ah, sorry about that, Riko-san," apologized You with a small blush as she retreated. "It won't happen again."

"Thank you."

The redhead settled back into her chair and kept reading, appreciating the relative silence as they climbed higher and higher until leveling out.

Then the beverage cart arrived.

"Here, You-chan! Try this sparkling cherry-cheese-chocolate ramune and tell me what you think!" A tall bottle passed in front of Riko's eyes, temporarily blocking her view of her book.

"Sure thing, Chika-chan. Here! Try this soy-mikan-mocha latte blend!" This time, a paper cup with steam rising from the hot liquid within was handed over.

"Mmm!" cheered Chika, "This is good!"

You beamed. "I'm glad you think so! Do you like the ginger? I only asked for extra ginger because I know you like it."

The ginger giggled. "The ginger is perfect," she replied. "What about the ramune? Is it any better than the flavors you can get at the convenience store?"

"It's definitely different, but I wouldn't say better," critiqued the brunette. "I'd give it a 7.5 out of 10 on the ramune deliciousness scale."

"What?!" gasped Chika, scandalized. "It's at least an 8.0!"

"Then _you_ can drink it!" laughed You as she handed it back, once again obscuring Riko's vision.

"Then you can have your latte back," smiled Chika as she returned the steaming hot cup, once again triggering Riko's fears that it would get spilled on her book.

As the girls beside her began sipping their beverages in peace, Riko thought the interruptions to her reading were over. She was wrong.

"Mmm!" hummed Chika happily. "These lemon flavored cookies are delicious! Try one, You-chan!" said Chika, thrusting a cookie over to her friend.

"Don't mind if I do," replied the brunette as she chomped down on the treat. "You're right, this is good. Here. Have my cinnamon stick."

Chika grabbed the sugared cylindrical biscuit, letting a few crumbs fall onto the redhead's book in her hurry to snack on it. "Not bad," she mused with approval.

"And if you're still hungry," said You as she reached into her backpack, "I've got a mikan here with your name on it!"

"Mikan!" cheered Chika as she lunged for the orange fruit.

Riko grunted loudly as Chika fell on her, the excited girl's fingers already breaking through the peel to the fleshy fruit within. "Do you mind?!" shrieked Riko as she glared at the interloper.

"Meep!"

"I'm _trying_ to read here, and I am _not_ your personal mattress!"

"Sorry about that, Riko-chan." Chika let out a nervous chuckle as she got off the softness of Riko's thighs, returning to her upright seated position.

Riko's eye couldn't help but twitch. She fumed as she returned to her book. "Please refrain from bothering me again," she said. ' _And don't address me so informally!_ ' she scolded mentally.

To their credit, Riko remained undisturbed for quite some time after that. Until she was, you know, disturbed.

This time, it was a large weight falling upon her shoulder that jolted her out of her book. Riko looked down to the sight of Chika breathing in peaceful slumber as she lay against the redhead without shame. Not that Riko expected to see shame on the face of a sleeping person, but still.

She turned to glance at You, who had also taken notice. "Sorry about Chika-chan," she said apologetically, "She usually falls asleep during long transits since there's nothing to really do, you know?"

"I don't suppose there's any way to shift her without waking her, is there?"

You furrowed her brow in thought. "Hmm... Not without a mikan, and I'm fresh out. Sorry," she said with a shrug.

' _A mikan?_ ' thought Riko in bewilderment. ' _Just what kind of girl...?_ ' She thought better than to ask. "Well, whatever," she mumbled, returning to her literature.

She didn't get too far. A few minutes later, a large weight fell upon her other shoulder.

Riko sighed in aggravated exasperation as not just one, but two heads of hair tickled at her throat. With the minimum of required arm movement, she checked her watch.

Their flight wasn't even half over.

* * *

Later...

Riko closed the cover of her novel, sighing in contentment after having thoroughly enjoyed the delicious yuri goodness bound within its pages. Despite the trials of the past few hours, the redhead had managed to power through most of the book, even with two shoulder weights pinning her arms down. As soon as the plane landed, she'd practically sprinted away from the two apologizing idiots into the airport's nearest Starducks where she could enjoy the grand finale (aka the promised eroticism) in peace.

And just in time too, as her connecting flight was about to begin boarding. Slipping her novel in her bag, she hummed a light tune as she made her way over to the gate, luggage in tow.

A few minutes later and she was stepping down the aisle of the second plane, looking for her seat. She stopped in front of a familiar pair of faces.

' _No fucking way,_ ' thought Riko.

The bright faces of Chika and You turned to stare at her. "Hey! Look who it is!" cheered Chika.

Riko heaved a sigh of resignation. This was going to be a long flight...

 **~END~**

.

.

.

 **Omake 1: Mid-Flight Madness**

"Just give me the aisle seat," said Riko wearily.

"Eh? Are you sure?" asked You.

"Does this face look unsure to you?"

Later...

"Would you like anything to drink, zura?"

"NOOOO! KEEP HER AWAY FROM ME! KEEP HER AWAY!" shrieked Riko as she clawed at You's clothes in an attempt to get away.

"Holy shit! She really does have a crippling phobia of flight attendants!"

.

 **Omake 2: Hotel Havoc**

"What do you mean double booked?!" cried Riko in anger as she faced down the apologetic face of the blonde hotel manager.

"I deeply apologize for this inconvenience, but it appears our system has you and a second party renting out the same suite. Ohara Hotels and Resorts is of course providing a full refund for your troubles, as well as a monetary credit as a more tangible form of apology. Additionally, we would still like to offer you the suite and any services you require free of charge, provided you and the other party would be willing to share the room."

Riko sighed deeply, her face scrunched in frustration. "Fine. It can't be any worse than my flight here. Who am I sharing a room with then?"

"Ah, here they come now actually."

"Riko-chan!" cheered a familiar voice. Riko slowly turned to see the smiling faces of Chika and You.

The redhead slapped her forehead. Of course it would...

.

 **Omake 3**

Later that night, Riko found out that she was actually totally fine with being Chika and You's personal mattress.

* * *

 **AN: Just accept it Riko, it's destiny. :P**


End file.
